with the secretary of defense. but i also can't be sergeant cooper because that might lead you to think of me as just a regular joe. this might take some thought. as you were. what the hell is wrong with you? yeah, how could you do that? what is it to you? i got his back. yeah, right. you're just jealous because it turns out i'm penny's #2 choice after leonard. hey, if i wasn't engaged to bernadette, that totally could have been me. please. sheldon would have been before you, and he might not even have genitals! why do you care so much? you're dating my sister, and penny and i are in love. what?! what?! gentlemen, if i may interject, i've decided my rank will be captain. if it's good enough for kirk, crunch, and kangaroo, it's good enough for me. you're not in love with penny. yes, i am. the god kamadeva has shot us with his flowery arrows of love. who? he's the hindu version of cupid, but way better, because he rides a giant parrot. raj, come on. you fall in love with any girl who smiles at you. a month ago, you were writing poems about his fiancée. i'm sorry. what? rubbish. he's talking rubbish. "